... :'(

..i've never felt so alone.

..eto yung mga times na binababa ko yung mga defenses ko and i just cry uncontrollably. yeah, what they see is that arrogant and offensive guy na akala nya nakakatuwa sya sa mga observations nya and shit... pero eto, di talaga maiwasan..

..i'm messing up again. big time. i'm 28 and ano na narating ko?

..wala pa din.

..meron,actually.madami.pero..iba eh.bakit ganito pa din?bakit wala yung satisfaction na hinahanap ko?

..bakit wala yung happiness?

..naalala ko ang sabi ni Stella.. "ikaw mismo ang gumagawa ng paraan para layuan ka ng mga taong malapit sayo"

..and she's never been so right.

..dahil na din sa kapalpakan ko, i lost my bestfriend. i lost my wife. i lost that certain someone na di ko aakalain at napansin na minahal pala ako ng seryoso.

..tapos eto, i actually tried opening up to someone that is super special din para sakin, and you know what i got?

"solve it yourself"

..may point sya,pero, ewan... i'm alone.

..i've never been so alone... and i've never been so scared.

..someone please help me. :'(

PS. yeah,there's supposed to be some kind of novel na ipopost ko dapat about my recent experience with "someone na di ko akalain at napansin na minahal pala ako ng seryoso", eh, di pa tapos. hehe. basta sa ngayon eto nararamdaman ko :'(